Post by QuiDormit on Apr 30, 2008 12:58:34 GMT -5
I've never been big on "I told you so's." Being right isn't always sunhine and happiness.
I was sitting alone in the dark in an empty office. I used to come here once a week and bare my soul; now I'm here to save one. I always liked this office. I liked the big comfortable chairs. I liked the warm smile that always greeted me. I liked the bright yellow paint on the walls. I liked the way the sun shone through the big picture window. This once was a safe place for me. Now, it feels cold and empty. The chair is uncomfortable, and the beautiful sun has been blacked out by the clouds as the rain slides down the window.
It took me a long time to work up the courage to come here again, to save her, to tell her the Truth. I wanted so badly to tell her the Truth. I wasn't sure that I had the nerve to say what needed to be said, but I wanted to try. I wanted to thank her for saving me from my path to destruction. I wanted her to see that I was right. I also wanted to show her that my soul searching finally paid off. I wanted her to see what I've seen. I wanted to free her from bondage. I wanted to tell her that things aren't right. Thinks are broken and that I was part of those trying to fix them again. I wanted her to believe me. She deserved to know what I knew.
Hell, it's because of her that I'm even bothering to take the time to write this down. She always told me to keep a journal. She said it would help me organize my thoughts. I haven't seen her since before I was freed, well over two months now. I owe her this.
The last time I saw her, I came into this same office, and she smiled that warm and loving smile she always gave me. I told her that I had something for her. I gave her a thin box and asked her to open it. She stared down for nearly 30 seconds before she said anything.
"It's... your journal?"
"Yeah."
"Why? Are you OK? Is everything OK?"
"For the first time in my life, I really think so."
"What's happened?"
"I don't know. It's... a feeling. I feel balanced. My thoughts are in order and I feel like I'm on the brink of something huge. Something important."
She looked at me. Her eyes were absolutely piercing. I could barely hold her gaze. She sighed and said, "You always were of your own mind. You're going to do great things." I stared back at her, and said, "Dr. Bell, thank you for everything. You've done more for me than words can tell. I am sorry that I cannot stay, but I have some things to do. Goodbye."
I turned to leave, and as I opened the door, she stopped me in my tracks. I was halfway out the door when she stated, "I'm never going to see you again, am I, Jason?" I said, "Maybe." She sighed again and said, "You're wrong, you know."
"What do you mean?"
"The world isn't as messed up as you think."
I couldn't face her, but I muttered, "We'll see," and walked out the door.
That wasn't easy then, but this is a hell of a lot harder. This was the most unnerving moment of my life. I waited patiently in her chair behind her desk and I planned my conversation. My thoughts were interrupted by a key being inserted into the door. The time had come. I was going to save her life.
She saw me and her face went pale instantly. She dropped her briefcase on the ground, and she was frozen still. A whisper escaped her lips. "You..."
That's when she began to change. Those bastard suits had tracked me. They must have been waiting for me the whole time. Was I that careless? I didn't have time to find out, because now, Dr. Bell was twitching uncontrollably. I've seen it before, but why her? Just as I turned, I heard a gruff voice shouting, "YOU!" I leaped out of the window into the black and rainy night, my silhouette briefly shown by the flashes of gunshots.
"See, Dr. Bell. I told you so."
I was sitting alone in the dark in an empty office. I used to come here once a week and bare my soul; now I'm here to save one. I always liked this office. I liked the big comfortable chairs. I liked the warm smile that always greeted me. I liked the bright yellow paint on the walls. I liked the way the sun shone through the big picture window. This once was a safe place for me. Now, it feels cold and empty. The chair is uncomfortable, and the beautiful sun has been blacked out by the clouds as the rain slides down the window.
It took me a long time to work up the courage to come here again, to save her, to tell her the Truth. I wanted so badly to tell her the Truth. I wasn't sure that I had the nerve to say what needed to be said, but I wanted to try. I wanted to thank her for saving me from my path to destruction. I wanted her to see that I was right. I also wanted to show her that my soul searching finally paid off. I wanted her to see what I've seen. I wanted to free her from bondage. I wanted to tell her that things aren't right. Thinks are broken and that I was part of those trying to fix them again. I wanted her to believe me. She deserved to know what I knew.
Hell, it's because of her that I'm even bothering to take the time to write this down. She always told me to keep a journal. She said it would help me organize my thoughts. I haven't seen her since before I was freed, well over two months now. I owe her this.
The last time I saw her, I came into this same office, and she smiled that warm and loving smile she always gave me. I told her that I had something for her. I gave her a thin box and asked her to open it. She stared down for nearly 30 seconds before she said anything.
"It's... your journal?"
"Yeah."
"Why? Are you OK? Is everything OK?"
"For the first time in my life, I really think so."
"What's happened?"
"I don't know. It's... a feeling. I feel balanced. My thoughts are in order and I feel like I'm on the brink of something huge. Something important."
She looked at me. Her eyes were absolutely piercing. I could barely hold her gaze. She sighed and said, "You always were of your own mind. You're going to do great things." I stared back at her, and said, "Dr. Bell, thank you for everything. You've done more for me than words can tell. I am sorry that I cannot stay, but I have some things to do. Goodbye."
I turned to leave, and as I opened the door, she stopped me in my tracks. I was halfway out the door when she stated, "I'm never going to see you again, am I, Jason?" I said, "Maybe." She sighed again and said, "You're wrong, you know."
"What do you mean?"
"The world isn't as messed up as you think."
I couldn't face her, but I muttered, "We'll see," and walked out the door.
That wasn't easy then, but this is a hell of a lot harder. This was the most unnerving moment of my life. I waited patiently in her chair behind her desk and I planned my conversation. My thoughts were interrupted by a key being inserted into the door. The time had come. I was going to save her life.
She saw me and her face went pale instantly. She dropped her briefcase on the ground, and she was frozen still. A whisper escaped her lips. "You..."
That's when she began to change. Those bastard suits had tracked me. They must have been waiting for me the whole time. Was I that careless? I didn't have time to find out, because now, Dr. Bell was twitching uncontrollably. I've seen it before, but why her? Just as I turned, I heard a gruff voice shouting, "YOU!" I leaped out of the window into the black and rainy night, my silhouette briefly shown by the flashes of gunshots.
"See, Dr. Bell. I told you so."
